naan kanda vidiyal?

Warning: Long Post. Highly Emotional.
Strictly No Personal Experiences, i thought.


But then something happened. Something happened, i knew immediately it belonged here. it is not everyday, you meet a girl, she takes you by awe or spirit and you cant sleep anymore. this is one such experience, one that you can cherish for all your life, one that you cannot afford to forget.
"chey! andha madhiri kadhaiya idhu?" - neenga... "konjam! konjam vera madhiri! " - idhu naan.

naan kanda vidiyal?

Night. I was in a state of kola veri sleep, waiting to board the bus to chennai.
A1 Travels nu edho paeru theriyadha travels.. wait pannum podhe avala pathuten...


Thorayaama she was okay - looking - hosanna kita ella vara mudiyaadhu., but okay!


namma aalu-ku ponnunga ellam jammunu irundha pidikaadhu, gummunu irundhaadhan pidikum!
water bag madhiri irundha kaadhaliklam-nu thonum. water bed madhiri irundha kattiklam-nu thonum.
andha ponnu second vareity.!


neenga thappa undstand panraku munnadiye, she was my guess twenty-six married.. she was with her husband. avalo alagaana ponnuku Actor sathyan theriyuma, (manmadhan-la "oru vela ivana irpano! oru vela avana irupano!" character?) avana madhiri irundhaan andha husband,
God alwayz playing thanga - pokka vaay kuduthu kayla masal vada kudutha,
enaku semma gaandu.. under-stomach ella burn aachu..


kuduthu vechavan-da husbend nu thinking pannite i got into the bus.! second from the last jannal seat.! Nice. Anda coupl got in; enaku munnadi seat-la.! Nice. My pakkathu seat got filled, character insignificant to story - vandhodna thoongirchu, Nice! Bus got filled slow slow-a;
Aparam oruthan vandhaanga - terror fellow. Paatha odne therichuten., payapulla basketball aaduvan pola tharudhala naay, 25/4 feet-ku konjam mela irundhirpaan., vandhu direct-a en pinnadi ukkandhaan., Seri okay nice.,


Attention back to water bed., sister golly-a ukkandhu lights, AC, curtains, seats, la ella veladichi. Seat recline panicha, nera en mela modhi, "Hello!", "Aiyoo Sorry, seat poite iruku", "Naan illa na pin seat varaikum pogum!" Point to note: Malayala kutty. Husband: "tiruvanmiyur enga iruku..?" nu pochu., dialogue., husbendu semma mokka., Gaandu back to the fullest form.,


:::BUS START::: Until this pt of time, i cared shit abut andha Malayala kutty or andha Sathyan Mama. I wouldn even have cared to mention those characters to my frenz., Alas! God playin - That vidhi lady, she intervened,.


this is wat happened: ellarum reclined their seats to sleep, my pakkathu seat kaaran was deep in sleep - already. everyone started sleepin. Vidhi, i couldn recline my seat, basket ball player en pinnadi i told you, periya kaalunga nothing cud be done. For obvious reasons of comfort and inertia, vertical-a irukara seat vida horizontal-a irukara seat more comfortable., angaye 15% sleep compromised. THEN IT HAPPENED. en munnadi ukkandhurkara that Malayaala kutty, Vidhi she pushed her seat back, full-a back, right onto my lap. Oru nimisham i was shocked.


Lord Krishnar mouth-a AAAA nu open pannapo, Mother Yasodha-ku therinjandhu illa; adhu enaku therinjudhu. Ulagame therinjudhu; Sagalamum therinjudhu..!


first light-a smile than vandhudhu., light-a comedy-a irundhudhu. Seri free, thoonga dhane porom nu i just left it at that, not that i cud have done anything,. Epdi-nga kooptu solla mudiyum., But seriously its not easy. Its not even close to possible. Night time driving apo opposite-la blinding high beam lights-oda vandi vandha kann enganga pogum? Light-ku dhane? Edhavadhu pannakudadhu, Edhavadhu paaka koodadhu nu nenecha, kai, kann enganga pogum??? I wasn at fault here., Sathiyama i had no choice. I was cornered, literal-a. I was helpless, literal-a.


Kashtapattu thoonga try pannen.,
Kitta thatta thoongiten.,
thought process, kanna pinnanu, Kanavu - Aiyoo, bayandhu poi,
Thoongi na kanavulayum adhaan varudhu. Muzhichirunda nerlayum adhan irukudhu.,!


First husbendu dhaan endhirchaan., Aiyoo pathutano, naan paakaradha! Ezhundu, mela blanket eduthu izhuthu pothitu thoongitaan., Ada iththu pona eethhara naye, un pondaatiya aduthavan..., Paathanga, i promise avanum paathan., sathiyama peek pannaan. I saw he saw. Cheap bastard..! Actuall-a avan paakalamo!? Even still... Then she woke up.,


it is to be understood that, time paatuku oditu iruku,. Naan dhaan bejara ukkandhirundhen., possibly the only non-driver in the bus, awake. And then she woke up., Aiyoo pathutalo, naan paakaradha, shal edutha., "Shite! She got me man!!!" i thought. Light kan-la adichdhu pola,  shal-a eduthu, face-a la rendu suthu suthi cover panni marupadi paduthurchu... Marupadi shock., Nadu-la face edhuku distraction., You carry on apdingara madhiri., Superlative bejar-ness!!!!


Ennennamo thinking., Thookam varla., Vairamuthu varraaru..., Kannadhaasan varraaru., God mela oru pudhu pattru vandhudhu., Andha shape illa, easy actuall-a; Evlo pera padachirupaaru, sure-a oru model irukum.., Single attempt, easy-a senjirupaaru? Aana adhuku andha proper color illa, andha texture kudukaraku evlo kashtapattrupaaru, evlo attempt adichirpaaru GOD.,., pakkathula paduthu thoongitu irukie da naye naye! Aiyoo idhuku mela mudiyadhu da.


speed breaker vandhaa -- shebbah -- ennatha solla?
1/2 adi speed breaker,
vandi aeri erangara-kulla sagalamum,
four inches raise aagi erangum theriyungala..,


adhu vera illa, speed breaker vara podhu nu therinja,
saami ellaam slow-mo vera aayirum...


medhu-uu-uu-va-a vann-ndi munn-nn-nnaa-aa-di po-o-ogum.
Slow-ow-ow-a spee-eed brea-a-ker varum.
soyyyyyyyng-nu oru break adippan-ga driver...
puyaluku munnadi oru amaidhi irukum thriyungala andha madhiri adhu..
*tak*-nu vandi speed breaker-a adikkum; heart one beat skip.
medhu-u-u-u-vaa ulla irukaradhellaam,
raise aaga aaramikum - slow motion - la;
stomach one-two-three-four times double-double flip adichi,
yabbbbaa-nu energy ella drain-aa,
*dhadakkk* nu erangum vandi..
totally unexpected-a..
stop aana heart tinggggg-unu blood sundi vidum paarunga.. flat!!!!!
total flat.


prior case-la i din know the speed breaker was coming, i had very short notice to compose meself.. rear wheels aerum bodhu i won have that problem - that's what you think.. that's what i thought... AAna, andha wait iruku paarunga, aiyoo - to know the same thing's to happen again, in just a few seconds time, only with a magnitude, yeah obviously greater than the previous one, up close, right under your seats..? *tapp*, nu mela aeri, *dhadakk*, nu erangi,!!!,


well... there were too many speed breakers between coimbatore and chennai.



After romba neram light off pannanga!
huge sigh of relief!
Absolute iruttu. Total-a;
eye-oda status open-a close-a nu kooda doubt varum! Sathiyama uyir vandha maari irunchu.
but She(avadhanga - vidhi) had something else in her mind.


Jannal orathula sitting-a adhu..? AC bus-a..? Windows full-a curtains-aala closed-a? Oru Curtain-kum innoru Curtain-kum nadula illa? Eppidinga solradhu - small gap? Streetlights?


Indha xerox machine paathrukingala?
Apdi-ye green light swyng-swyng nu end to end
pogum theriyungala.,
andha maari andha small gap between the curtains vaziya,
hundred feet ku oru street light..
bottom to top, bottom to top, bottom to top, scene-a trace panni, en karpu la velaadirchu.
Summa-ve kadhi kalangi iruken. Special effectz veraiya?
Adiye(avadhan avadhan vidhi vidhi), idhukku vidivu kaalame kedayadha?


Adhayum paathen? Edha? Vidiyaradhathan..! Karumam semester exam-ku kooda night out adichu padichadhilla saami, ..


kaalai-la bus-la irundhu erangi,
auto-la avanga appeat aagara varaikum
avunga pinnadiye ponen. Thiruvanmiyur-aam! Hmmmm! kuduthu vecha Oooru!


P.S: - Ippo epdi thirupi thirupi oru matter-a padichitu irundha by-heart aayirum; oru song-a thirupi thirupi kaetutu irundha pudichu poirum illa; 'adhe kangal' padam paathirukingala, adhula villain face-la mask potu full-a cover pannirupaan, eyes only theriyum. hero one time dhan andha eyes-a paapan. But once again paatha sure-a andha aalu yaaru-nu find out panniruvaan. Face not necessay eyes enough. Adhe maari dhanga naanum, next time paatha, Face not necessary, sure-a kandu pidichiruven.

teyvidiya! - a definition.

thevaradiyaal = thevar + adiyaal enbadhu theiyndhu kaala pokkil thevaradiya/ thevdiya endru peyar pettradhu. 


pandaiya kaalathil temple-ku varum bigshot makkalai kushi padutha pagalum, *iravum* ayaraadhu ulaikum dance girls-ai thevarku adiyar apdi nu sonnanga!!! ivangaloda soul aim, "Idai thazhuvi kolla?Jadai thadavi kolla? jameen ezhudhi kodu seemaane!!" Then mudhal now varai the sense of the word remains the same. Well, almost.

its true that there's general feeling... namma ooru teyvidiya ella oru level english teyvidiya ella vera level. tamil-la translate kooda panna mudiyaadhu. maybe.

take even the word for instance. there are a number of words in english representing them - slut, whore, prostitute, callgirl, hooker; but in tamil? Tevdiya. For all the richness of the language that they boast..! Only teyvidya. kalaignar yoschirundhaa kanneer-e viduvaaru.

not to worry all forms of short forms have been formally formulated by namma aalu -
the means slut
thev means slut
thevi means slut
thevid means slut
thevidi means slut
thevidiya also means slut

say sripriya illa sridevi nu oru ponnu iruka nu vechikunga... Short-ah "Sri! mooditu po", "Sri! Saathitu vaa", "Sri! pothhitu iru" nu sollolaam. AANA Thejasri illana Thejaswini appidi nu oru ponnu irundha... paeru vachha avanga amma evlo feel pannuvaanga!

aana of recent-a tevdiya-oda current trend-e maari pochu. See! for example, nooru ponnunga nadandhu ponalum, adhula 50 beauty queen, 50 vetti scene-a irundhaalum, namma aaluku ellarum tevdiya-va dhan therivanga. Romba simple logic, oru paiyan kitta oru ponnu pesalina, andha ponnu teyvidiyah. neenga vena poi endha college paiyan kitta vena kaetu parunga, "day, andha ponnu epdi da?" nu? Standard reply, "teyvidiya machan ava!!!"

But english-la evlo dhaan words irundhaalum, tami-la irukara andha one word-ku undaana madhiri-yaana power, punch vera endha language-la-yume illa nu sollalam. See road-la pora edho oru ponnu kitta poi, "Go! you prostitute" na evlo kayvalama iruku? Aana, adhe ponnu kitta, "Podi! thevadiya" nu solli paarunga, left kannathula sappu nu onnu vilm. That's the power of tamil..! indha thamizh-a ulaga mozhi aakara varaikum sathiyamaa naan thoonga poradhilla. tat's the mission of this blog. Ella Pugazhum iraivanuke.

You still dont understand why sentamil teyvadiya is better than Ol' English prostitute? i'l give you a better example.!
Take basic instinct movie for instance, there's a classic scene ther..! Nick interrogates Kath,
"Were yu dating him?" "No, i was jus fucking him." "What are you? A pro?" "No! i am an amateur."

Tamil-la yoschi paarunga, "Neenga avaroda oor suthitu irundhingalaa?", "Naan chumma pottutu thaan irundhen." " Neenga enna teyvadiyava?" "Che! adhalla illanga naan kuthumadhippa thaan poduven...!"
You see the difference at least now? Adhaanga namma tamil...!

And on a final note, there is just one thing that is to be addressed, indha blog title ezhudhum bodhu strike aana oru matter.. indha word illa, romba beautiful-aana oru word. it has a ring to it. utter pannum bodhe oru sense of rhythm is attached to it, you don say thevadiya no - it sounds very country. its not thevadiyaal either, it sounds very kalaignar, (then thevdiya pulla will become thevadiyaal pettra thirumagale - no not thevadiyaal), you call them theyvdiya, infact, its t-ey-vidyah, the "ei"sound is very important. "Eiyy" "tey"vid-and a final touching-"ah".

So this first blog post of mine, i dedicate it to the community, the religion, the untiring souls who work their ass(?) for the happiness of matha jeevans, and all those girls who never spoke to me. Bleddy teyvidiyas!